I’m not being mistreated.
There’s no big drama.
I just don’t like this person.
Working together feels heavy,
even when things are “fine.”
I don’t want to quit.
But I don’t want to be exhausted either.
What do you do in this situation?
Ossan’s answer:
First, I stop expecting the situation
to feel neutral.
Dislike creates friction.
Pretending it shouldn’t
adds another layer of work.
Then I get specific.
I don’t ask,
“How do I like this person more?”
I ask,
“Where am I spending energy I don’t need to?”
Do I over-explain?
Do I stay overly polite?
Do I replay conversations later?
Those are the real drains.
Working with someone you dislike
isn’t about changing them.
It’s about reducing unnecessary regulation
on your side.
Not all of it.
Just the parts that don’t protect anything important.
You’re allowed to be functional
without being open.
Clear without being warm.
Present without being invested.
That’s not failure.
It’s choosing sustainability
over imaginary harmony.
And once you make that shift,
the work doesn’t get easier—
but it gets lighter.
Which is usually enough to keep going.